My mother left me with a baby (my sister) in my arms

Hey! Today Stacy want to tell you a story how she became a mum for my little sister when she was 18.

I didn’t have a very happy childhood. I never knew my father and my mother was a conductor on a sleeper train. So we rarely spent time together. My grandma was bringing me up. But she was too old and sometimes she couldn’t even play with me. Grandma didn’t like my mother's job. Besides, she didn’t like that my mum was searching for a husband at the weekend instead of spending her time with the daughter. I loved my mother, but for me she was something like Santa – seems like she exists but it’s impossible to catch her.

I cannot say I suffered a lot because of parents’ absence. When my grandma wasn’t arguing with my mum, she was very nice. My friends helped me not to feel lonely. Moreover, I got a favourite hobby from my grandma – I really loved knitting.

When me and granny were free from the housework, we were knitting socks, booties and all kinds of scarves. Then grandma sold it in the market and we earned a living. There were not much money in my family, as you can guess. Of course, my mum added something, but the main income came from the knitting. We didn’t have time to get bored and suffer.

When the school had started, I had less free time. Beside everyday housework and knitting there was also school homework. So, granny taught me to be responsible and follow the daily routine. I don't know if it was right but adults thought I was a perfect kid.

When I was 14, my mother suddenly came back home with a screaming envelope. She said the baby's father had left her, and she couldn't cope with this burden. The tiny kid (it was a girl) became our care and responsibility. Of course, no one asked us – we were just pinned down to facts. My grandma and I sighed, bit the bullet and started to raise my sister. My mother ceased to appear in my life at all.

A small kid is a real nightmare. Granny and I stayed up all night. We bought tons of kids’ mixes and al-ways carry the baby on our arms as she was constantly crying. Then there were lines in the hospital, teething and other «pleasures» of having a baby at home. And on top of that - I was only 14, and my granny was well over her 80s. We were far from being good nannies.

At that time I was mostly afraid that my granny would not survive the stress and die. It was my biggest nightmare – being left alone with a baby. Honestly, sometimes I thought it would be better for me just to stay in a boarding school. At least you can normally eat and sleep there.

Then the girl grew up and it became much easier. She was very funny, active and smart - so messing with her was a real pleasure. I taught her to read, write, draw and all the stuff a small kid needs. Then I found some part-time job and I started buying toys, clothes and sweets for my sister on my pocket money.

All in all, we went on our daily life. My little sister shared all her problems with me, and I was really happy. We had our own wonderful world where there was no place for anyone else. Still, there was also our grandma, but when I was 17 she was too weak and could not help us anymore. I had to get on my own.

I went working instead of continuing my studies after school. I was lucky - a small company offered me a job as a personal assistant, even though I had no experience and higher education. They didn’t make me any indecent hints. Of course, the salary was small but we had enough. My sister went to a kinder-garten and my grandma lied in bed most of the time, but she held on. Things became perfect.

But our fairytale came to an end when I was 18. My grandma died in sleepping. She passed away quickly with no pain. We buried her and now there were just the two of us. Yeah, things became harder without grandma, but we held on. Until my mother came back.

She arrived a month later after grandma's funeral. And she demanded we get out of her apartment. Luckily, it was my working day and my sister was in the kindergarten. I was afraid my mother would have scared the kid. Later I just showed her the document stating that I was the only grandma's succes-sor. Besides, my grandma re-registered the apartment to me when I was very small. Mum had to go away.

Then she decided to do the other way. She went up to my sister and told her that I was a bad daughter not letting the mummy in. But the kid said that I was her real mum.

I cannot describe my feelings at that moment. It was pride, and love, and a whole range of just inde-scribable emotions. Yes, I'm just 18, I have a whole life ahead, but my whole life is my little sister. And I would face all the obstacles standing in our way.

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